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Playing It Cool In an Affair
“Missing me?” I texted my lover. “You know I’m missing you,” he replied. “Of course. But I gotta be cool about it,” he added. “Harumph,” I texted. Damn him. Mister Cool. As I was bleeding out. “You...
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Double Standard: How Cheaters React To Being Cheated On
It is astonishing that having “fallen” themselves, cheaters turn out to be least likely to be understanding of their partner’s indiscretion. Astonishing, that they will not take a pause and reflect...
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The Power Dynamics of Adultery
Let’s talk about the shift in power in adultery. I’ve done this enough to have seen this play out in real time. Not in every affair, mind you. But in most. Women have all the power in looking for an...
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Women Cheat to Leave; Men Cheat to Stay
What is the truth? Do women cheat to leave? Do men cheat to stay? It’s not so simple. The assumption is that women are more “emotionally driven” and won’t step out unless they find husband 2.0. And...
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The Stages of Surviving an Affair
Relationships can be complicated. At the very least, they’re complex because people are complex. And at no time is that more evident than when a married couple is in the throes of surviving an affair....
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What Should You Do if You’re Caught in an Affair?
Affairs are more common than you’d think. Roughly 50% of marriages are faced with some sort of infidelity at some point during their relationship. So… what do you do if you’re caught up in an affair?...
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Why Cheating Excuses Will NEVER Help You Heal
Infidelity always has its reasons, usually layers and layers deep within the cheater and the marriage itself. But the reasons that make a person or relationship vulnerable to infidelity are never...
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When Effort Ends — Your Affair Expiration Date
His typing skills went from complete sentences like, “I’ve been busy with work, babe. You know I can’t text often.” To “When u free to fuck?” Effort gone. That’s when you realized he sucked at...
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A Friend Had an Affair with a Married Man — Should I have Told his Wife?
A few years ago, my housemate, who I’ll call Kaya, confessed to me that she was having an affair with a married man I’ll call Phil. When I first heard about it, I didn’t really know what to think....
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When a Man Has an Extramarital Affair, He Is Most Afraid of Being Asked These...
As long as you can pinpoint his key points, he will definitely show his tricks. When a man has an extramarital affair, he is most afraid of being asked these three questions. As long as he is asked,...
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10 Signs of a Struggling Marriage
Every relationship will experience ups and downs, but there are several symptoms you should pay particular attention to see if they indicate that something in your marriage is not functioning...
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Affair Multiple Choice Quiz
Let’s do a quiz! It’s about illicit out-of-network sex, duh! My specialty. Let’s teach you guys what is the correct answer. It’s easy. Even a cave man can get this right, I promise. How do you reply to...
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Should You Ask Your Husband’s Mistress to End Their Affair?
Proof of my husband’s affair came from a picture. At first, I grasped for explanations, but there was no denying it. His mistress posed for him, wearing little more than a coy smile. It felt taunting —...
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Was It for Me Wrong to Sleep With My Friend’s Ex?
Hi Dr. NerdLove, I decided to message you, because I did something stupid and worry it will be difficult for me and my friendship group to move on from it – I need some straight-talking. CONTEXT: I...
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Can You Heal a Relationship After You Have an Affair? (You Can at Least Try)
*** Indiscretion and relationships go hand in hand. At some point in many relationships, one person is weaker and decides to step out of their union. The affair usually drives a wedge in the...
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Listen Up Guys! Here Is What Women Tell Me Is the Number One Threat to Your...
— There are many ways a relationship can be threatened, but as Mrs. Murphy (pseudonym) said, they are all just symptoms of an underlying cause, and that cause is lack of trust. Trust, or rather the...
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You Shouldn’t Be Texting Your Affair Partner
Do you text your lover? Not a good idea. OPSEC 101. Let me teach you the right ways to cheat. Texting is not secure. “Why should I care?” you ask. Cause, dummy, all your dirty secrets will be exposed....
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What Happens When Your Affair Partner Gets Caught?
What message do we all dread in affair land? “Don’t message me, I’ve been caught.” That one. It’s game over. All the sweet texts, kiss them goodbye. The naughty pics. Every day back and forth. GONE....
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My Friend Is Having an Affair With an Older, Married Man. Should I Say...
Dear Dr. NerdLove, I am writing to you in desperate hopes of understanding the psychological reasons behind a difficult situation that my friend finds herself in. Her predicament involves a deeply...
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I Am Your Husband’s Mistress
I’m the woman who slept with your husband. You lost any interest you had in him. You told him you could only tolerate having sex with him when you were drunk. You got pregnant, hoping to “save” your...
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